Everyone, This Is A Kitchen...

Obesity is a problem.  It's now even considered a disease according to the AMA.  Lap-band surgery, diet pills, stomach stapling are now a normal thing for a person to receive.  Even unsafe diet pills are now a norm.  Exercise and proper diet have seem to just go by the wayside.  Everyone sees the commercial for the diet pills where the sub-100 pound blonde on a beach lost so much weight by taking a pill or drinking a juice.  They just don't see that fine print when the before and after photo pops up and reads "compared to just regular diet and exercise".  Everyone wants instant results.  People would rather be given a fish, than taught to fish.

This bitch sucks.

Now, before I go into how or why obesity went from being just a description to being a "contagious illness", we need to look at how our family structure has changed over the years.  Men/husbands have worked jobs outside of the home for the most part.  Women/wives have also worked outside of the home, mostly the same hours as their men.  And that's great.  It really is good for families to have more money coming in.  Some families don't need 2 earning incomes, but the majority do in this era.  There in lies a conflict.

How we got fat was an unintended consequence stemming from no one resuming kitchen duties for themselves, their mates, or their kids.  Mom and Pop come home after an 8 hour shift, don't feel like cooking, and don't have the energy to cook for another 90 minutes and include healthy food groups.  "Hey honey, wanna just get some pizza, or takeout, or hop over to (chain restaurant in the area)?" "Sure, you drive" says the other.  The family gets seated, eats plates of offerings that can pass for food, and then the family has a lighter wallet by the end.

This isn't to say that feminism caused obesity.  I'm saying Men not taking over kitchen duties resulted in obesity.  Let's look at the labor statistics: women are staying in school longer, earning more degrees, and getting more jobs than men are, AND becoming the primary earner!  But where are the stay-at-home Dads a.k.a. the greatest gig a man can wish for?  Why aren't they swapping roles?  Men can do anything but breastfeed.

It's important that everyone that feels like they are getting unhealthier, stop, look in their kitchen, and learn how to cook.  Whether it's Julia Child's books, instructional classes, or bringing in an elder to teach a treasured family recipe, it's important to pass on cooking lessons that can translate into survival lessons.

Now, I have thought long and hard.  If primary earner men were to have a role-reversal with their wives, meaning that men would become the ones dusting, turning down beds, cooking suppers, do laundry, cleaning the kitchen, making lunches, and everything in between that a Depression-Era housewife would assume given that the men worked all day, I think we men and women might become closer in their relationships.  I say, let's (as men) let women run this world!

Why not?  Here are some reasons:
-Sports would be on during the daytime, eliminating the rush for night games and eventually saving electricity in most ballparks and stadiums.
-Soaps, talk shows, and whatever shows women watch would move to after 6pm.  The cast of the View, The Chat, The Talk and whatever would be recast with Ex-Wrestlers, retired basketball players, and stand-ups.
-Men would FINALLY know what the mailman's name is.
-Telemarketing would cease to exist since Men don't buy shit over the phone unless it's funneling beer through a hat or keeping nacho cheese from congealing.
-Cars would get smaller, and designed for a woman, maybe even by a woman.
-I would like to see heavy lifting jobs be carried out by men.  I don't think a 110 lb woman will do much good lifting a fat passed out man from a burning apartment building.

What I'm saying is that men and women would be benefiting from their strengths in the Internet era since women have begun to surpass men.  When the post-Internet era comes, whatever that produces, maybe men will rise up again.  But for now, it's time we all learn about what's on our plate.

The Ninja Mega Kitchen System and Why Bald Guys With Glasses Have to Promote things.

So I woke up this weekend and figured I would turn on some TV to see what is on since I didn't want to watch Netflix programming.  I came across this infomercial about a blender since I just love making smoothies.  However, the guy doing the infomercial is just another "made in the board room" personality.  They occur all the time.  Just look at Food Network and tell me that these personalities weren't decided upon by a group of people thinking viewers of all backgrounds could relate.  Why the image of someone is ranked higher than the actual demonstration of a person is beyond me.

If you've ever seen an episode of MasterChef, or even a commercial, you can tell what I'm talking about.  Let met illustrate.

In this picture are the hosts/judges on the Master Chef show.  On the left is Joe Bastianich, who is a chef who I swear could've seen on Bravo's Top Chef when I watched daytime TV and worked nights.  Looks like a stylish chef who probably won't cook for you unless you've ordered a pricey wine and don't mind eating tiny portioned meals.  Next in line is Chef Gordon Ramsay, who is known for telling everyone in the restaurant business their dishes are salty, bland, or dog's bollocks.  On the left is a man who looks like Chaz Bono.  I'm not kidding, go google Chaz Bono.  I'll wait.

(waiting)

Ok, see the resemblance?  Now, if you were the producers of the TV show, why wouldn't you just have the third judge be a woman?  I remember seeing an episode of this show with family, and one person chimed in, "What makes me trust this person?".  That question alone shows that the decisions involved in a cooking competition show are made by people who are worried about relating to all types of viewers rather than the quality of content.  

The tattoos, the funky glasses, the LA looks hair, and the fact that he never wears a suit, is a dead giveaway that the producers want to reach hipster-foodies who may or may not look like Chaz Bono.  Not to take anything away from this show or the Chefs on it, but ONE WOMAN COULD RELATE MORE TO YOUR VIEWERS THAN ANYONE WITH TATTOOS AND HIPSTER GLASSES!!!!!!! (I know TV producers aren't reading this, but it needed to be yelled)

Now I know that high-stakes cooking is all the rage with TV watchers and "I can totally relate to the weird one" viewers.  I just don't understand why the producers don't get one woman judge on this show.  Other high-stakes cooking shows have made the jump, so why not this one.

We all know the scenario at one of the dish tastings.  Chef Joe B walks up to the table, stares at the cook and then the dish with a questionable look that Patton had when he went to Russia.  He tastes the dish praying he doesn't die, but also looking pissed for being paid millions to eat food in front of a camera.  

You call this shit Tapas! Whack!

Gordon Ramsay walks over picking up the fork, moving around some of the food while saying "F*** me" or "F***ing Hell" and then tasting it.  Probably has 14-15 wrinkles show up on his forehead in the process and then heads back to the judges stand.  I'm guessing the Hipster-Judge walks over and tastes the food looking completely satisfied that he is getting paid to eat food in front of a camera with some Tommy Bahama shirt on.  Now that I think about it, maybe the fat-hipster guy is the normal one and the two uptight pricks are just uptight pricks who steal tips from kitchen staff.  

But back to the blender infomercial that has the guy fist-pumping the blender working.  Can the image of a fat man with hipster glasses just be inviting for some people?  Maybe the sight of a heavyset bald man just seems a bit intense?  Maybe a thin Ty Pennington looking guy with a flavor saver just doesn't appeal anymore?  Who knows, but the answer lies within our brains.  If it is true about fat guys with hipster glasses, maybe I need to get a pair of Warby Parker's.  

Here's what I was talking about:

And again, this time single serving:

Brenda is so impressed, but baldy here seems to be hearing dubstep instead of a blender going off.  

Here is a demonstration by a youtuber that bought a Ninja system, just to see how it works.

Stay healthy kids!

Famous Fat Guy in Cinema: John Candy

When I talked earlier about Hollywood's perception of Fat Guys, I mentioned how larger men were shrinking down for more serious roles.  The first time I saw John Candy was in Uncle Buck.  I think I remember seeing it first on TBS, probably around the time I was 8-9 years old or so.  The infamous "unbreakable plate" was my first laugh at his genius.  The more I think about Uncle Buck, the more I laugh.  The drill scene at the party (shown above).  His car that explodes out of the tailpipe.  His quick one-liners are what really stayed with me.  "What's tweedle-dinks name?...Bug...Bug?...First or last?...First....What's his last name spray?"  Classic.

This scene, when Uncle Buck has to go to the Vice Principal's office to talk about Molly.  Probably the funniest scene that to this day hasn't really been duplicated in another movie.

Now I don't want to stick with one movie to commemorate a man.  He got a role as the Wally World security guard in Vacation, when Clark Griswold and the family show up and the park is closed.  His role as Ox in the hilarious movie Stripes was great, too.  He was a member of Second City, which is to this day, a popular Improv society for up and coming comedians and actors (Candy was part of Second City Toronto- along with Eugene Levy, Catherine O'Hara and Martin Short).

Candy's movie career exploded during the 1980's.  He was among the comedic titans - Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Martin Short, John Belushi, Steve Martin, Chevy Chase.  Candy is the one who was only seemed to be able to deliver a serious speech while being a leading man in a comedy.  It's hard to compare his presence to another performer's.  Dan Aykroyd was in serious roles, but his comedy roles seemed a bit over the top.

Candy's last couple of roles are still some of the best family appropriate comedies: Cool Runnings, Rookie of the Year, and Canadian Bacon.  His last film: Canadian Bacon, is one of those movies that you can laugh at whenever you want to remember some of the absurdity that was part of the Cold War.  Directed by, and I'm not kidding, Michael Moore (yes, that Michael Moore),this movie makes me think of what Moore's career would've been had he made comedies over documentaries.

In Candy's final years, he had tried to keep his weight a private subject.  He weighed in excess of 300 lbs, and had a family history of heart attacks.  Trying to quit smoking, along with losing weight, Candy suffered a heart attack that was fatal.  It was a sad end to a truly great comedian and actor.

Having a family history of illness and health defects is a hard truth to escape.  Heart attacks, high blood pressure, and even addiction, are really hard to overcome when growing up and finding out your place in the world.  It's hard to imagine John Candy living in a movie making world filled with body image issues and unbreakable habits.  I can't see him having a social media account, instagramming his dinner, or slimming down with some trendy diet system.  John Candy was and will always be a jolly funnyman who provided so much comedy and memories in cinema that are lacking nowadays.  If you don't agree, you can take a dime, and go downtown and have a rat gnaw that thing of your face!  Good day to you Madam! (Uncle Buck quote...I couldn't help)

Weight Loss Blog!

Okay, so I'm starting a weight loss/weight management blog.  Mainly because people have this idea that thin is happy and if you took a look around, that clearly is not the case.  Now I've usually been the kid in my family to go up to the buffet table 5-6 times and come back with a plate full of meat.  I did this feat at the ripe age or 11 by the way (ask my family).

But being fat and having this fat guy persona isn't so much of a bad thing.  What brings people down isn't their fat, it's the response from people looking at their fat and thinking they are disgusting or some other negative response.  If you take a look at some of the historically funnier and brighter people in history - most of them are fat.  They didn't care about their fat per se, but they cared about the idea of how they were perceived.  If they wanted to be perceived as powerful, they would see their fat as a strength against their puny little opponents.  I'd rather be well-fed than malnourished any day of the week.  There is such a thing as a starving artist and a fed artist.

Being fat, or obese, as many health insurance companies will put it now, isn't a bad thing.  In fact, I believe that there is this triangular based theory related to one's weight that will dictate one's sense of humor, one's sense of narcissism, and one's sense of happiness.  In fact, the same theory goes for with people who believe themselves to be ugly.  Let's not forget that the "prettier" people in society do not have to have the same set of skills that another person must attain to be a viable member of the workforce.  Much like how height affects one's earning power, I believe that the same could go for people who are overweight and/ugly, but in a negative fashion.  I don't know of any study out there for this, but it would seem interesting to look at.

In the up coming posts, I will take a look at people who are fat, happy, and in very powerful positions in life.

Welcome to Fat Guy in a Little World!

Well I decided to go back to writing a blog again.  This time I'm hoping I'm going to be a little better at it than previously.  I'd prefer that newer readers just read the new blogs instead of backtracking and wondering what went on here.  So, I've decided to write about normal guy stuff.  Relationships or lack there of, Food, Health, Movies, Books, Music, Sports, maybe every now and then I'll post a video or make a comment on a video or some internet meme.  I don't intend on becoming anything like Art of Manliness or Mr. Moneymustache.

So, why is this blog called Fat Guy in a Little World?  Because 1) no one took the blog name, 2) the domain name wasn't take either 3) I am a kinda sorta fat guy in a little world and most importantly 4) I just like Chris Farley.  So come on in, have a read and don't be afraid to comment and share.